Reunions, aren't you curious?
I think it was last week when I was watching the season finale of 90210 (please don’t judge me), and I thought to myself.....I can’t believe my 20 year reunion is happening in a month. 20 years. Two decades. I have gone to college, traveled, moved across the country from where I grew up, gotten married, gotten hired, gotten laid off, changed jobs 4-5 times, had children, moved numerous amounts of times, bought and sold property, lost all of my grandparents, run two half marathons, and the list goes on. I thought about all the songs that have been created since 1991. I think about all the things that I that I have seen and experienced since the day I got my high school diploma. And, I realize that 20 years is a long time. A landmark of time. A long enough time period where I am curious. But, I think we, the curious ones, are a truly dying breed.
Recently, there was an article posted on NPR’s website called “ School Reunions? Nah, I've Got Facebook”. I was sorry to read that most people are relying on Facebook as their so called reunion. And, after finding out that 31 out of 520 people are officially signed up for my 20 year reunion, I unfortunately don’t think that this article is far off. 31? I thought maybe it would be around 100. And, even 100 seemed low.
When I heard 31 a few things went through my mind: How can this be? Are people really that disinterested in revisiting a part of their past? Their history? Should I not be flying in from Chicago to LA? And, then I thought to myself. Wait. Who cares? It’s 30 people (okay maybe 25 not including those who I have seen since high school) who I haven’t seen in 20 years, and for that-it’s worth it. At least it is to me.
Truthfully, I must say that I am disappointed. Not in the people who have major conflicts (I have my daughter’s dance recital that I am sadly missing and hope to watch via skype or DVD) but in the people who don’t. Who live 10 minutes away or even 3 hours, who just aren’t “feeling” it. Come on people! Where’s your Taft Toreador spirit? While high school was a hard time and a dark period for many people (I had my moments), I guess I was hoping people would be okay with it by now. We all have insecurities. And, we all won’t see each other for at least 20 more years. So why not? To me, it would be great to see those who mapped even the tiniest part of the mid-late part of my teen years. I guess I thought more people would have wanted to come eat some bad hotel chicken and drink a few overpriced, watered down cocktails...My elementary school reunion that we had two years ago (thanks to Facebook) had about 15 people, and that was in a class of about 35. It’s sad, people.
I missed my 10 year. It was right after 9-11. I had been to Europe in October, then flown to LA for a wedding also in October, and then two weeks later was my 10 year. I was packed and ready to go, and then that guy ran through the Detroit airport naked about 3 hours before my departure from Chicago O’Hare. And, I said forget it. I am not going. 10 years later, I do regret it. Why? Because a lot of the people who aren’t going to the 20 year went to the 10 year. And, it was in the pre-Facebook days. And, it was also pre-kid for me. And, it would have been a heck of a lot easier to pop out of town for a 3-4 day weekend in 2001 because of where I was in my life 10 years ago. But, mostly because I let down my friends who thought I was going.
While Facebook is fun (guilty as charged), let’s be honest for a second and admit that it’s not real. It’s a self advertisement and a way to promote the good in your life. It’s not very often that we see people mentioning what anti-depressants they are taking. Or, how their therapy session went last Wednesday. People aren’t talking about their pending divorce, typically. It’s the perfect...not real world (minus a few vents here and there). So, in my opinion.... it’s certainly not a replacement for a hug, a shake of the hand, and the ability to really see and talk to people. In the real world.
I have had a lot of good (thankfully) and some bad (unfortunately) happen in 20 years. I am not as thin as I would like to be, and I certainly wish I looked like I did when I was 17. But, I am healthy (thankfully) and more happy than unhappy (again thankfully), so I figure why not? What if I am not alive in 20 years (I hope this is not the case). So, I have to seize the day. And, I wish that others (aside from the 31) would too. It would make it so much more interesting. Think about it. If everyone just said “fine...I am going to go for it!” Then, there would be better stories to tell. A better pool of things to talk about. And, more people to discuss AFTER the actual reunion. There’s an after party after our reunion, and frankly when I got the invite I kind of felt like it was 1991 and I actually felt cool. For a second.
So, where does this tie into parenting. Well, it does and it doesn’t. I feel like this is purely something for me. It has nothing to do with my kids. And, very little to do with my husband. I met him about 1 month after I graduated from high school, actually. So, he’s the next chapter. And aside from exercise and spending nights at dinners, a few games of bunko and a few parties here and there, I find that as a parent there really is very little that is purely about me. So, that’s, sadly but true, another reason to go and embrace it. On the flip side, I have been telling my kids that I graduated high school in 1991. The reaction is priceless, “20 years???!!!” they ask. And, it’s followed by “Wow. That was a long time ago.”
Recently, there was an article posted on NPR’s website called “ School Reunions? Nah, I've Got Facebook”. I was sorry to read that most people are relying on Facebook as their so called reunion. And, after finding out that 31 out of 520 people are officially signed up for my 20 year reunion, I unfortunately don’t think that this article is far off. 31? I thought maybe it would be around 100. And, even 100 seemed low.
When I heard 31 a few things went through my mind: How can this be? Are people really that disinterested in revisiting a part of their past? Their history? Should I not be flying in from Chicago to LA? And, then I thought to myself. Wait. Who cares? It’s 30 people (okay maybe 25 not including those who I have seen since high school) who I haven’t seen in 20 years, and for that-it’s worth it. At least it is to me.
Truthfully, I must say that I am disappointed. Not in the people who have major conflicts (I have my daughter’s dance recital that I am sadly missing and hope to watch via skype or DVD) but in the people who don’t. Who live 10 minutes away or even 3 hours, who just aren’t “feeling” it. Come on people! Where’s your Taft Toreador spirit? While high school was a hard time and a dark period for many people (I had my moments), I guess I was hoping people would be okay with it by now. We all have insecurities. And, we all won’t see each other for at least 20 more years. So why not? To me, it would be great to see those who mapped even the tiniest part of the mid-late part of my teen years. I guess I thought more people would have wanted to come eat some bad hotel chicken and drink a few overpriced, watered down cocktails...My elementary school reunion that we had two years ago (thanks to Facebook) had about 15 people, and that was in a class of about 35. It’s sad, people.
I missed my 10 year. It was right after 9-11. I had been to Europe in October, then flown to LA for a wedding also in October, and then two weeks later was my 10 year. I was packed and ready to go, and then that guy ran through the Detroit airport naked about 3 hours before my departure from Chicago O’Hare. And, I said forget it. I am not going. 10 years later, I do regret it. Why? Because a lot of the people who aren’t going to the 20 year went to the 10 year. And, it was in the pre-Facebook days. And, it was also pre-kid for me. And, it would have been a heck of a lot easier to pop out of town for a 3-4 day weekend in 2001 because of where I was in my life 10 years ago. But, mostly because I let down my friends who thought I was going.
While Facebook is fun (guilty as charged), let’s be honest for a second and admit that it’s not real. It’s a self advertisement and a way to promote the good in your life. It’s not very often that we see people mentioning what anti-depressants they are taking. Or, how their therapy session went last Wednesday. People aren’t talking about their pending divorce, typically. It’s the perfect...not real world (minus a few vents here and there). So, in my opinion.... it’s certainly not a replacement for a hug, a shake of the hand, and the ability to really see and talk to people. In the real world.
I have had a lot of good (thankfully) and some bad (unfortunately) happen in 20 years. I am not as thin as I would like to be, and I certainly wish I looked like I did when I was 17. But, I am healthy (thankfully) and more happy than unhappy (again thankfully), so I figure why not? What if I am not alive in 20 years (I hope this is not the case). So, I have to seize the day. And, I wish that others (aside from the 31) would too. It would make it so much more interesting. Think about it. If everyone just said “fine...I am going to go for it!” Then, there would be better stories to tell. A better pool of things to talk about. And, more people to discuss AFTER the actual reunion. There’s an after party after our reunion, and frankly when I got the invite I kind of felt like it was 1991 and I actually felt cool. For a second.
So, where does this tie into parenting. Well, it does and it doesn’t. I feel like this is purely something for me. It has nothing to do with my kids. And, very little to do with my husband. I met him about 1 month after I graduated from high school, actually. So, he’s the next chapter. And aside from exercise and spending nights at dinners, a few games of bunko and a few parties here and there, I find that as a parent there really is very little that is purely about me. So, that’s, sadly but true, another reason to go and embrace it. On the flip side, I have been telling my kids that I graduated high school in 1991. The reaction is priceless, “20 years???!!!” they ask. And, it’s followed by “Wow. That was a long time ago.”
Awesome story!!!!! I agree! We should all just GO! Since I had my first child, 5 1/2 years ago, I have not been out alone! I'm leaving my children and husband behind to reunite w/old friends!!!! I plan on enjoying every minute even if we're only 39(new count)! Hope u not going, change ur mind and decide to go last minute;) pay at the door! Be bold! Take a chance! We make our own fun!
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